hey kiddos

just hanging out here in glasgow. it's overcast and autumnal. i'm listening to status quo and jackson browne and the beat, but just as a short break from listening to you.

i'm feeling you, I'm feeling your online presence. we're not deliberately taking a long time, but we are deliberating. the consultation process made it's way south of the river this afternoon, when I was in the presence of Judge Jackson and QC Bob Kildea.

I’m sorry if I have left the guys rather on their own over this one. I’ve been concentrating on the ladies. Your due time is creeping up, fellahs! (and the numbers of you who are entering.)

I’m still going to need a bit of time, I hope you don’t mind. I may have to do a ‘tiny’ bit more setting of tasks, but not much.

In the meantime, hope you are feeling good, whoever you are, wherever you are...

stuart

hi folks, specifically the ladies

today is the last day for entries to the singing competition. we will retire for a while and consider all you have done.

i must say that I've come to enjoy the process, and the spirit in which it has taken place has been very homely. to me it felt like the beginning of the book 'charlie and the chocolate factory', with people checking in from all round the world. if i'd been any good i would have had a huge map of the world with little flags to show where you all posted from.

we will have a good think, and further listens, and we may ask some of you to sing the song you didn't already sing, so that we may hear more of your range and style. (this may take a little while, before we get some of you over to Glasgow!)

A couple of other things...

Be assured that we have been listening to the entries sent by email, even though correspondence may not have been entered into.

Also, that those in faraway time zones were allowed to post during October 1st, their time!

Also, please note, that although the 'media' record for the 'God Help The Girl' group might show that our listening habits were sporadic, we were in fact scouring the entries through a series of pseudonyms! Nothing was missed...

If we contact you it will only be from 'God Help The Girl' though, or a 'banchory.net' email address.

In the meantime, thank you for taking part, and thank you for reading!

stuart

Hi folks,

Just in case you thought we had abandoned you, we are still pouring over your efforts keenly! The standard has reached quite a shocking level - consistently high! I am amazed and surprised. I can only guess at how hard this is to do, coming cold to a track, having no say in the pitch or arrangement or tempo. But you really are doing a great job.

We are enjoying the videos also. It may have taken extra balls to get on camera, but it does help us pick up on your personalities, so the extra effort is worth it. It’s a friendly little move!

Don’t be perturbed if you think your track doesn’t reach ‘hi-fi’ quality. We can pretty much tell what kind of job you’re doing whatever you are recording on, though it’s been pleasant listening to the array of ‘smooth production jobs’ that have been presented so far. It is flattering that you have gone to the trouble of making such a nice noise!

There have been some technical, and otherwise, questions asked. In the forum, John will go through some of the most common ones - but may I answer one first?

Ok fellahs, we’re hearing you. We were going to leave this till later, but your interest has inspired us. We have a work in progress version of one of the songs, called ‘Perfection as a Hipster’. Gary Olson, from Brooklyn’s Ladybug Transistor is this week’s guest professional.

Gary has very kindly laid down a vocal on the track, along with our own Catherine Ireton. Have a listen on the audio player, and if you’re up for it, download the instrumental here and plug yourself in. The lyrics can be found here.

I know you’re only getting one track to work at, but somehow I think you’ll manage o.k..

If you’re wondering about your motivation for singing (and hey, this is musical drama after all!) you are the custodian of a a charity clothes shop. You are leaning on the counter on a sleepy Tuesday when in walks Girl 1.

A little unkempt, but still obviously something pretty special, you watch her move round the isles of clothing in a catlike way. Not only do you get to dress her up in the best things your boutique can offer, but you have to scrape her off the ground and revive her when she passes out in the changing room; the hero momentarily; her adventures that morning must have proved too much.

She recovers, leaving as quickly as she arrived, though better dressed. She’s off down the street, while you desperately try to negotiate the morning off with your old-lady co-workers. They just don’t understand your hurry!

You have until October 12th, men. Good luck.

Stuart Murdoch from Belle and Sebastian is looking for performers /singers to participate in a project called 'God Help The Girl' which he is currently developing.

He is making an album of songs based around different voices, which will subsequently be put together to form the backbone of a musical film which he is writing. Go here to read Stuart's full introduction to the project.

At present, he is looking for female singers to record the songs. They will represent the main characters in the film, but he is also looking for other singers to sing in supporting roles.

Members of Belle and Sebastian will be involved as the studio band for some of the recording, which will hopefully take place later this year.

By following the links around this site - you will be able to listen to and record your own version of one of two songs which have been recorded so far. Have a look around and go here for full instructions on how to put yourself forward for one of the parts. Thanks for your interest & Good luck!

Here are the lyrics for 'Funny Little Frog':

Honey lovin you is the greatest thing
I get to be myself and I get to sing
I get to play at being irresponsible
I come home late at night and I love your soul
I never forget you in my prayers
I never have a bad thing to report

You're my picture on the wall, you're my vision in the hall
You're the one I'm talking to, when I get in from my work
You're my guy and you don't even know it
You're the funny little frog in my throat

My eyesight's fading, mjy hearing's dim
I can't get insured for the state I'm in
I'm a danger to myself I've been starting fights
At the party at the club on a Saturday night
But I don't get disapproving from my boy
He gets all the highlights wrapped in joy

You're my picture on the wall, you're my vision in the hall
You're the one I'm talking to, when I get in from my work
You're my guy and you don't even know it
I am livin out the life of a poet
I am the jester in the ancient court
You're the funny little frog in my throat

I had a conversation with you at night
It's a little one sided but that's all right
I tell you in the kitchen about my day
You sit on the bed in the dark changing places
With the ghost that was there before you came
You've come to save my life again

I don't dare to touch your hand
I don't dare to think of you in a physical way
And i don't know how you smell
You're the cover of my magazine
You're a fashion tip, a living museum

I'd pay to visit you on rainy Sundays
I'll maybe tell you all about it someday

Here are the lyrics for 'The Psychiatrist Is In':

grow up, you’re nearly 31
what happened when you were a child
do you require an analyst?
or will a friendly smile suffice?

find your space are you breathing well
do you feel o.k.
are you calm are you comfortable
is your heartbeat racing
is this your soul your facing?

lay down my couch is over there
I think you’ll find its way more comfortable
take off your glasses don’t be scared
for thirty pounds I’ll listen to your
stories dear, shut the window there
we should keep the session intimate don’t you agree?

I have experience in matters similar
I can’t juggle I can’t knit a pinafore
but I’ll listen to your tale and give you some advice

I was an ace when I was young
I learned to dance, I didn’t have to learn
I was a case when I grew up
A case of hope, crashing to the ground

I learned, I hit the skids and I
woke up me myself and I was a different person
if I take you on will you be pliable
as a confidante I’m quite reliable
dreamer though you are
it is you that’ my signpost so far

So I should really tell you what I’ve been up to the last while. Well I just ate this brownie that was so thick and buttery, with the ground up coffee beans, that my heart is having to beat quite hard to deal with it all. So I might as well use the extra beats to tell you what I was thinking.

It’s been a fantastically cold summer in Glasgow so far. There has been no real delineation between the spring and the summer except for the leaves creeping out sheepishly. I don’t mind so much. I’ve been staying in and doing jigsaws a lot. Every now and again I reach over to the arm on the record player and put it back to the beginning of Sealed With A Kiss by Brian Hyland. “It’s going to be a cool lonely summer”, he sings. As long as Brian’s around to chum me I don’t mind it so much.

I don’t mind so much because I’m trying to piece together the story of a better summer, or at least a summer when something happened. It happened to a boy and a girl and a girl, in a city roughly the same size and population of Glasgow. Perhaps the canals were a bit grimier, the high-rise buildings taller. The streets emptier when you needed them to be, and the beat clubs busier than the ones around here. But on the whole the city was this one.

That’s what I wanted to tell you about. They had such a nice summer one year. It was quite unexpected, the way that nice things quite often are. Girl 1 arrived in town. She looked around for a while, and played in a ladies football league. She ran into The Boy as he was closing up the local swimming pool.

So she ended up getting the bedsit next door to him. And they met Girl 2 when Girl 1 decided that the Boy wasn’t getting out enough. The Boy was kind of flexible on account of the fact that nobody had shown much interest in him for a while. For quite a few years actually. So he went along, prepared to teach Girl 2 all he knew about the steel strung acoustic guitar that he cradled. Girl 2 wanted to learn, but more than that she wanted to sing to somebody, and tell somebody about what was happening. So she attached herself to Girl 1 and the Boy, and there you have it.

As I mentioned, they were a musical bunch, though none had ever been told that, and none would ever proclaim it. But that summer had a way of chipping the music out of them. They rubbed against each other in such a way that songs would come. They would come at quiet times of the night when they were on their own, and they would arrive suddenly when the other two were around. It was just that kind of a summer.

So it presents me with a problem. I’ve got the city. I can see it from here, and it’s free.

I’ve got the city, but I’m looking for the people. I’m looking for the girl, the other girl and the boy. In fact, I’m looking for all the various characters that pepper the scene. (They come along and say what they have to say in an unusually musical way, and then move on.) I’m looking for them too.

So that’s where I thought you might be able to help me. You’ve read this far. Somehow you’ve found your way to this place, so I figure that makes you about a thousand times more qualified to help me than the average person in the street. Maybe ten thousand. You could probably help me, or perhaps you know someone who could help.

If you were interested in getting involved, or if you knew someone who might be good for it, all you or they would have to do is to go here, and try your luck at singing. We’ve tried to make it easy for you. We’ve put in a Belle and Sebastian tune, albeit played in a different way, or you could listen to a new tune, called The Psychiatrist Is In, which is sung by Catherine, and which will be sung by Girl 1 in the finished recorded version….

…because we’re making a record of all the songs the kids wrote that summer, and we’re looking for people to sing them. Right this minute we’re looking for the girls, but the boys may follow.

We’re making a record, because that’s what we do. But when the time and the mood are right, the record will become a film. A MOVIE!

So we’d like you to send a picture of yourself with your recording, and perhaps a little bit of information about yourself. If you’ve done this kind of thing before, for instance, or if you can tango, or play the banjo. (and if you haven’t, just as good! we just want people who can sing nice!)